Every year, starting the week of Thanksgiving, I become an Amazon Lightning Deals addict. Seriously. The first thing I do every morning (after I check my shopping cart full of wish list items to see if any prices have dropped) is to click on that little Today’s Deals link at the top of the page. Suddenly, sales are spread before me, beckoning me with 40% off, 60% off, 80% off. 80%! That’s almost free! Those evil deals tempt me until about January 2nd, at which time I almost forget they are there until the following November.
Lightning Deals can be hit or miss as far as value. Toy deals this year have been pretty decent, at least in terms of the ones I was looking for. I may or may not have gone a little nuts last weekend buying every Lalaloopsy toy that scrolled across my screen. Some were as low as $3.77! How could I pass those up?!? (Note to readers: if anyone needs some Lalaloopsy dolls for Christmas, I have extra!)
Even on the days when I think they have nothing that I need, I get entangled in the Lightning Deals web.
Scrolling through today’s Lightning Deals
Okay…I will admit that I already have one of these. Not this exact one, but similar. And I have a lot of scarves and it’s getting kind of full, so…
A good deal on dog shampoo! Except…I can barely remember to bathe my child, so the chances that I’ll start regularly bathing my dog are slim.
Oh my. An ugly sweater kit. “Sweater kit allows for creative customization not found in other ugly sweaters.” Well, yes, but is that really necessary? Are there design contests? I must admit that I have never quite gotten the ugly sweater tradition. Adults gather for parties wearing the ugliest Christmas-themed sweater they can find. Well, now they can create their own! It’s fun! “…we hope you can put all seriousness aside and let your creativity take over.” Creativity is serious, folks! For only $19.99 I can stare blankly at a sweater and random craft supplies, knock back a swig of Christmas brandy, and hope for inspiration.
Scrolling past what seems like hundreds of watches and boxed computer software (do people still buy software in boxes??) until I find this gem:
Let’s pass over the concept of cooking my food with infrared and focus instead on the electric grill part. Isn’t the whole point of grilling outside that you’re cooking over an open flame? Why would I haul my food outside to a grill that I have to plug in? Is this the true grilling experience? How is this any different than slapping my steaks onto the George Foreman in the kitchen…in fact, why couldn’t I just put this grill in the kitchen? Check out the picture of the man and woman grinning on their patio balcony while he pokes at the shish-kebob. He’s gritting his teeth and grinning, thinking “I sure hope none of my buddies see me cooking on this thing”, while she is grinning with an “I can’t believe it was so easy to trick him into cooking” thought bubble. Moral of the story: as long as it’s grill-shaped, men will want to cook on it.
Scrolling…scrolling…men’s pants, suitcases, bedding, a cat tree, more watches, a motocross bike, binoculars… Wait, a motocross bike?
It’s battery-powered / electric so it’s “super quiet.” But…don’t bikers actually enjoy hearing the roar of the engine when they are off-roading or on a course? Then there’s this: “Speeds up to 12 miles per hour with no pedaling needed!” No pedaling needed? On a motocross bike? I should hope not. Maybe there’s a niche for these that I don’t know about; otherwise, do serious motocross riders actually buy their bikes from Amazon?
I must admit, I was immediately intrigued by the concept of this. A sideways candle? Wow, how cool, and how would it work? Then I clicked, and my excitement faded a bit. This contraption is a novelty at best. I mean, the candle is horizontal, but the wick isn’t, so the flame is still burning from an upright position. This candle unwinds as it burns and supposedly no wax drips from it either. Meh – could be neat. But, if you’re looking for a novelty gift for that certain someone, this might be a fun option. I’ve got 4 hours until it goes on sale; if it’s a good deal, I may pick one up.
Is your ugly sweater party just a tad dull? Did everyone decorate their sweaters with the same kit? Be of good cheer. For only $1.45/ounce, your guests can enjoy cocoa from whimsical ugly sweater-themed boxes. Just add water.
Hmm…”ChewGuard Technology”. My golden retriever is a beast with dog toys. I may have to put this to the test.
Oh my…look at those cats! I feel an irresistible urge to buy this, insert my kitty, and dip her in water. “Cat wears the bag by slipping into the zippered top opening…” Haha! Yes, I’m sure it is just that simple. I would imagine that it would be not so much slipping my kitty into the bag as it would be stuffing a yowling, flailing kitty inside.
Maybe if I put this on her first, I might have a chance.
My scrolling is now showing me deals from tomorrow morning, so that wraps it up for today.
Do you see how addictive? Before I started looking, I had no idea I might really need a horizontal candle, a high-tech chew toy, and a kitty-dipping bag. Now I do.
Amazon and its Lightning Deals have accomplished their mission for another day.